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Sep. 22nd, 2005 08:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kribbanI sometimes wonder what the point of single life is. In a way it seems to be considered nothing more than a waiting period between relationships. I'll be twenty six in a few months and have been an adult for quite some time. I'm not prepared to give that up and go back to some sort of youth/waiting-person in limbo. I've been living a family life for years. When other kids were living in dorms and floating around in life (and liking it, I'm sure :-) I was leading a very stable home life.
For the past seven years my personal life has been the center of my energies and effort. You go to school or work or parents and then you go home to your partner and work on your relationship. At the end of the work week there's quality time and domestic bliss to be had. I know I'm doing the lesbian thing and really using the word partnership a lot, but that's really what it is. To build a life together, to learn about each other, respect each others' differences, to compromise, make plans for the future and be there for one another. I keep thinking that's the purpose of life.
What now? I go home to an empty apartment? A life where I only care about myself? No one to make plans with? A future of growing older alone? And don't say I'll find someone because the idea of meeting a new person and starting all over in telling that person everything about yourself (which took me five years the last time!) is really not very appealing. Intimacy and honesty is hard work!
I should just go live under a rock and get a cat to love and nurture.
For the past seven years my personal life has been the center of my energies and effort. You go to school or work or parents and then you go home to your partner and work on your relationship. At the end of the work week there's quality time and domestic bliss to be had. I know I'm doing the lesbian thing and really using the word partnership a lot, but that's really what it is. To build a life together, to learn about each other, respect each others' differences, to compromise, make plans for the future and be there for one another. I keep thinking that's the purpose of life.
What now? I go home to an empty apartment? A life where I only care about myself? No one to make plans with? A future of growing older alone? And don't say I'll find someone because the idea of meeting a new person and starting all over in telling that person everything about yourself (which took me five years the last time!) is really not very appealing. Intimacy and honesty is hard work!
I should just go live under a rock and get a cat to love and nurture.
