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kribbanIt is snowing!! Yeah!!! It´s snowed before, but now it looks like a regular winter wonder land. Man, I might just go out for a walk today, even though I´m sick, JUST to feel the snow under my boots. I think I´m going to go down to the meadow. I just developed the pictures from last summer when we were by the meadow a lot, including having lemonade and pastry with my parents there one day (which was great despite my father being cranky and huffing about how crap everything was and how many immigrants were there). Lovely pictures, Malin looks like an elf lost in a sea of green, wearing her green dress with gold embroidery.
It´s weird though, I remember the last time I walked that path in the snow. It was in January! I remember it clearly, I was taking a break in doing revisions om my thesis that I was presenting in two weeks, and I was thinking of two things: The Highlander gen fic-series I was totally obsessed with at the time, and planning to go see this new film called The Fellowship of the Ring.
I can´t for the life of me believe it´s been a year! Soon it´s January again and it will be one year since that day. And soon it´s Christmas! Again! I don´t even want to think about Christmas right now.
It´s so funny, Christmas 2000 seems like a year or so ago, and Christmas 2001 seems like last month. 2002 feels brand new and still it´s almost at an end.... In a few months it will be 2003. And I´ll be 23 in one month. Malin will be 30 next year. Wow. Where do all the days go?
There´s another thing that´s been puzzling me: Last year I never really had the chance to enjoy or even notice that the Holliday season was coming up because I was so immersed in my thesis. It was a really intense semester with two tough classes + the thesis, and I was stupid and lazy enough to *not* mail my draft to my tutor until the last week before deadline. Then she practically dissed it (and boy was she right!!) and gave me a long list of things to add/change in five days. So I rushed home and read the book I hadn´t read (!) and rewrote the whole thing without sleeping or eating properly, and somehow, don´t ask me how, I managed to hand it in in time. (What do you call writing the summary a few hours before handing it in? Incredibly stupid, or incredibly stupid?!) And *then* after managing *that*, I had the worst exam I´ve *ever* had, on "The Concept of Time" by Heidegger. (Which happens to be my least favourite philosopher and I never want to *think* of Sein und Zeit again.) I think that´s the only time I´ve ever actually started crying over an exam!! And then when that was done there was rewriting and rewriting and rewriting of the thesis... Which I spent better part of the holliday doing. And then there was the hellish experience of defending it to a room full of people. (I sucked SO hard it´s unbelievable) Can you say 'tongue-tied'?
But I´m getting way off track here. The point is that now, one year after, my mind is going "Oh, but wasn´t that fun?" and I´m sitting here all nostalgic and sad MISSING those days!
WTF? Am I just incredibly STUPID or what? Why does the brain work like that? There´s just this void in me after I finished everything.
And I´ve an exam tomorrow, on HTML. I´m skipping school to study. I also posted part 2 of CI last night and I´ve got some fb to read. yay! for feedback.
It´s weird though, I remember the last time I walked that path in the snow. It was in January! I remember it clearly, I was taking a break in doing revisions om my thesis that I was presenting in two weeks, and I was thinking of two things: The Highlander gen fic-series I was totally obsessed with at the time, and planning to go see this new film called The Fellowship of the Ring.
I can´t for the life of me believe it´s been a year! Soon it´s January again and it will be one year since that day. And soon it´s Christmas! Again! I don´t even want to think about Christmas right now.
It´s so funny, Christmas 2000 seems like a year or so ago, and Christmas 2001 seems like last month. 2002 feels brand new and still it´s almost at an end.... In a few months it will be 2003. And I´ll be 23 in one month. Malin will be 30 next year. Wow. Where do all the days go?
There´s another thing that´s been puzzling me: Last year I never really had the chance to enjoy or even notice that the Holliday season was coming up because I was so immersed in my thesis. It was a really intense semester with two tough classes + the thesis, and I was stupid and lazy enough to *not* mail my draft to my tutor until the last week before deadline. Then she practically dissed it (and boy was she right!!) and gave me a long list of things to add/change in five days. So I rushed home and read the book I hadn´t read (!) and rewrote the whole thing without sleeping or eating properly, and somehow, don´t ask me how, I managed to hand it in in time. (What do you call writing the summary a few hours before handing it in? Incredibly stupid, or incredibly stupid?!) And *then* after managing *that*, I had the worst exam I´ve *ever* had, on "The Concept of Time" by Heidegger. (Which happens to be my least favourite philosopher and I never want to *think* of Sein und Zeit again.) I think that´s the only time I´ve ever actually started crying over an exam!! And then when that was done there was rewriting and rewriting and rewriting of the thesis... Which I spent better part of the holliday doing. And then there was the hellish experience of defending it to a room full of people. (I sucked SO hard it´s unbelievable) Can you say 'tongue-tied'?
But I´m getting way off track here. The point is that now, one year after, my mind is going "Oh, but wasn´t that fun?" and I´m sitting here all nostalgic and sad MISSING those days!
WTF? Am I just incredibly STUPID or what? Why does the brain work like that? There´s just this void in me after I finished everything.
And I´ve an exam tomorrow, on HTML. I´m skipping school to study. I also posted part 2 of CI last night and I´ve got some fb to read. yay! for feedback.
