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Oct. 6th, 2003 08:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kribbanTo quote Denis Leary.... WWW.WHATTHEFUCK???.COM
I shared this with my dear![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
silversolitaire last night but this is too good (?) not to share. This is probably the worst slash story I have ever read and I forced Malin to read it too and she was gaping open mouthed at me and then laughing for ten minutes afterwards. I want to make sure that I don't consider myself to be an impeccable writer in any way and that this writer is talanted and I don't mean to imply that she has bad language or anything of the sort. Just... GAH. UHm. Is it just me or does this person have some sort of fethish? And the characterization... Uhm. This gives OOC a new meaning. I can't explain it to you so I have enclosed a few quotes beneath. You have to read it to understand.
Now for the said thing. It's X-Files, Mulder/Skinner. (No! Not my Mulder/Skinner ship!!!!!) Mulder is, eh, special? And Skinner is "special" as well. And the author is very special...
The title and name of the author is of course disclosed since I don't like to scorn people publically.
The sight of Mulder so relaxed and sexually aroused with his erection on his belly was something that Skinner
would treasure forever. The younger man was in a totally submissive posture with his engorged genitals getting pinker and redder by the second and the pink puckered orifice fully exposed.
"Push against my finger like you're going to pass stool, Fox," Skinner instructed. "Don't worry, you're not going to mess the bed."
Mulder was nervous again as he did what Skinner said.
But his eyes transformed when the AD's lubricated finger went up his tight anus. Mulder gasped at the unfamiliar sensation, totally different to the distaste that his last rectal exam had elicited from him.
"I feel like I'm going to take a dump," Mulder said a little nervously after a few minutes as he felt Skinner's thick index finger go beyond the ring of his sphincters.
"I feel kind of full."
[----]
"Are you sore?" Skinner asked.
"Somewhat," Mulder answered sleepily as he allowed his former boss to clean him like a newborn baby.
"Is anal intercourse like that, sir?"
[---]
Then Mulder was suddenly distracted and blushed as he stopped and pulled away from the older man.
He looked uncertain.
"You need to go?" Skinner said tolerantly. Mulder blushed even more and hurried out of the bed. Skinner laughed to himself, careful that Mulder not hear him or else he would just be more embarrassed. Of course,
Skinner knew that it would happen. He had felt Mulder's rectal vault which was full of stool when he had his
finger up him.
[---]
Skinner shrugged and read more of the literature accompanying the Fleet thing. He read the instructions carefully and positioned Mulder as was illustrated on the paper. As he pumped in the fluid, Mulder shivered, complaining that it felt cold. They waited for a few minutes, with both of them watching the morning cartoons, although Mulder was the one paying more attention. The clear solution lived up to its name and Mulder rushed to the bathroom for the second time that morning as his bowels emptied most of its contents.
Disclaimer-ish: I just want to add that though I admire that she actually mentions feces in anal sex I think she clearly overdos it. I plan on writing a kitchen sex virginity story one day that doesn't ignore the feces-part of sex but this is just ridiculous! And Mulder acting like a baby! A trembling, virginal blushing baby. Yeah and this is the guy who watches porn all day and calls 1800-numbers between chasing down aliens in dark alleyways. Sigh.
I shared this with my dear
silversolitaire last night but this is too good (?) not to share. This is probably the worst slash story I have ever read and I forced Malin to read it too and she was gaping open mouthed at me and then laughing for ten minutes afterwards. I want to make sure that I don't consider myself to be an impeccable writer in any way and that this writer is talanted and I don't mean to imply that she has bad language or anything of the sort. Just... GAH. UHm. Is it just me or does this person have some sort of fethish? And the characterization... Uhm. This gives OOC a new meaning. I can't explain it to you so I have enclosed a few quotes beneath. You have to read it to understand. Now for the said thing. It's X-Files, Mulder/Skinner. (No! Not my Mulder/Skinner ship!!!!!) Mulder is, eh, special? And Skinner is "special" as well. And the author is very special...
The title and name of the author is of course disclosed since I don't like to scorn people publically.
The sight of Mulder so relaxed and sexually aroused with his erection on his belly was something that Skinner
would treasure forever. The younger man was in a totally submissive posture with his engorged genitals getting pinker and redder by the second and the pink puckered orifice fully exposed.
"Push against my finger like you're going to pass stool, Fox," Skinner instructed. "Don't worry, you're not going to mess the bed."
Mulder was nervous again as he did what Skinner said.
But his eyes transformed when the AD's lubricated finger went up his tight anus. Mulder gasped at the unfamiliar sensation, totally different to the distaste that his last rectal exam had elicited from him.
"I feel like I'm going to take a dump," Mulder said a little nervously after a few minutes as he felt Skinner's thick index finger go beyond the ring of his sphincters.
"I feel kind of full."
[----]
"Are you sore?" Skinner asked.
"Somewhat," Mulder answered sleepily as he allowed his former boss to clean him like a newborn baby.
"Is anal intercourse like that, sir?"
[---]
Then Mulder was suddenly distracted and blushed as he stopped and pulled away from the older man.
He looked uncertain.
"You need to go?" Skinner said tolerantly. Mulder blushed even more and hurried out of the bed. Skinner laughed to himself, careful that Mulder not hear him or else he would just be more embarrassed. Of course,
Skinner knew that it would happen. He had felt Mulder's rectal vault which was full of stool when he had his
finger up him.
[---]
Skinner shrugged and read more of the literature accompanying the Fleet thing. He read the instructions carefully and positioned Mulder as was illustrated on the paper. As he pumped in the fluid, Mulder shivered, complaining that it felt cold. They waited for a few minutes, with both of them watching the morning cartoons, although Mulder was the one paying more attention. The clear solution lived up to its name and Mulder rushed to the bathroom for the second time that morning as his bowels emptied most of its contents.
Disclaimer-ish: I just want to add that though I admire that she actually mentions feces in anal sex I think she clearly overdos it. I plan on writing a kitchen sex virginity story one day that doesn't ignore the feces-part of sex but this is just ridiculous! And Mulder acting like a baby! A trembling, virginal blushing baby. Yeah and this is the guy who watches porn all day and calls 1800-numbers between chasing down aliens in dark alleyways. Sigh.
